And the home of the…..TIMBERS

By: Bob Kellett | May 2nd, 2008

The workweek closes with the Friday Tribits from which we learn that the Timbers players are following the NBA playoffs. Yep, it has been a slow news week. We also get confirmation that the club has scheduled a friendly with an Italian club on June 14. Loyal readers of this little ol’ blog know that said Italian club is Juventus Primavera, the youth team of the Serie A side. The identities of the other exhibition opponents this summer remain a mystery. I have been trying to keep track of which European clubs are planning tours on U.S. soil. As of now there aren’t many coming this way. If I were an economics major I might explain that the lack of activity has something to do with the weak dollar, but since I can’t even balance a checkbook I probably am talking out of my ass. By the way, the word is that the Portland Tribune will be switching to a once a week print schedule. On the whole I won’t miss reading Tight Jeans (who has his own thoughts on MLS expansion this week) and Co. twice a week, but Steve Brandon has done an excellent job of providing us with bits of Timbers news the past few years. I hope he can still do this in a weekly format and on their website.

Sharp Dressed Men
You might have noticed that Gavin Wilkinson has been looking rather dapper wearing suits during games this season. He isn’t the only one. He has imposed a team rule that all of the players must show up to the stadium wearing a suit on match days. The organization picked up the tab for each player to get a suit, which is a nice little perk for players making next to nothing. It is the kind of thing that will convince players that they are playing for a first rate club and I am convinced that this is quickly becoming a first rate club from top to bottom.

Mahoney on MLS
Ridge Mahoney of Soccer America checks in on Portland’s MLS expansion chances and lays out some of the challenges facing Timbers owner Merritt Paulson. From what I have seen, the general consensus of fans and journalists living outside of Portland is that they think that the city would be great for MLS but that it isn’t going to get a team. Way too early to tell how this will all play out.

The new Crockett and Tubbs
Former Timbers keeper Sam Reynolds, who was briefly in training camp this year, has signed on to be Josh Saunder’s backup in Miami. Reynolds held a similar role in Portland in 2005. It is also interesting to see that Miami has inked Avery John, a defender who teamed up with Brent Sancho as part of Trinidad and Tobago’s backline in the 2006 World Cup. From what I have seen of Miami this year they could sure use the defensive help. Even if John is in the declining years of his career he will make Miami a better team this season.

A Decade of Dombrowskis
All I can say is that the woman who popped out the five Dombrowski brothers ought to receive an honorary doctorate from the University of Wisconsin-Milwaukee.

Aaran F*cking Lines playing Down Under
Where in the world is Aaran Lines these days? Glad you asked. The one-time Timbers midfielder has moved on from the USL First Division to something called the Victorian Premier League in Australia. Lines is playing for Richmond SC, which is located in Melbourne, a city that is slightly more appealing to live in than Rochester.

A wedding is not complete without a Timbers garter belt

eBay scares the bejeebus out of me.

A Chance to Spy on the Enemies
With no Timbers games on tap this weekend, we are reduced to watching the competition. Rochester kicks off their season with a lovely two games in three days road trip to Charleston and Minnesota. In fact, the Rhinos start the season with five straight games on the road. I remember when they were the 10,000-pound gorilla of the league and pretty much dictated their schedule. Times have changed. They even travel west of the Mississippi these days. Anyway, you can catch Rochester in action over on USL Live on Friday at 4:30pm and Sunday at 3:05pm. It will be worth tuning in to see if Luke Kreamalmayer is really truly their starting right back. I still think Rochester is a playoff team, but they might struggle early. You can also tune into Fox Soccer Channel Friday night to watch a rematch of the final from last year with Seattle playing at Atlanta. Apparently Roger Levesque got a boo-boo on his ankle playing against the Timbers last week and will sit out this game. A moment of prayer for his health, please.

My beer consumption this season will pay for your salary
Here’s a golden opportunity for those of you who want to become a cog in a corporate machine. You can be the general manager in charging of providing overpriced, underwhelming food at PGE Park. As your reward you will be paid $60-$70K a year and you will have access to all the Miller Lite you can drink. If you do get the job I will be in your debt if you actually can convince Centerplate to produce something edible for those of us who don’t eat meat. Ice cream sandwiches pulled from a deranged fan’s shorts don’t count. Many thanks.

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